Proverbs
12 reminds me of the extra burden put on the first born of a family.
Parents have great expectations of the oldest to plot a course and be
an example for all the other children. In Solomon’s day, the
entire burden fell on the first son. We see it today with large
families too. Often an entire family excels in a particular sport, or
has a certain reputation, or chose a similar profession. The younger
very often follow in the steps of the oldest. I picture Solomon
making notes to himself, realizing every conversation cannot turn
into “another lecture”. This might be a peek at his bedside
tablet. First note: “Whoever
loves discipline loves knowledge, but whoever hates correction is
stupid“. There is a
great image here of the one who does not take instruction being a
dumb ox. He does not make decisions, nor does he learn, but rather
he is driven by someone else his whole life. The question becomes,
Who holds the reins in your life?
Second Note: “A
wife of noble character is her husband’s crown, but a disgraceful
wife is like decay in his bones“.
Younger siblings are also watching to observe how big brother will
choose a mate. What kind of a man is he? What kind of woman does he
attract? Will she come beside him and be a helpmate, or will she
battle for control? All of our decisions begin to take root and
sprout in Note Three: “The
plans of the righteous are just…
the
speech of the upright rescues… Better to be a nobody and yet have a
servant than
pretend
to be somebody and have no food“.
Are you tired of pretending?
Over
time, our life becomes a plowed field with furrows visible to all
with the produce growing and ripening. Here are some fruits to
observe before marriage. Note four: “The
righteous care for the needs of their animals, but the kindest acts
of the wicked are cruel“.
It is beneficial to spend time with a potential mate in the presence
of friends and family so others can observe their interactions.
Kindness is hard to fake. Note Five: “Those
who
work
their land will have abundant food“.
Does he plow straight, or does he need lots of prodding? Note Six:
“From the
fruit of their lips people are filled with good things, and the work
of their hands brings them reward“.
In a very similar way, we plant seeds in others through our words.
Note Seven, do they listen? “The
way of fools seems right to them, but the wise listen to advice“.
Nothing
is more emotionally eroding
than a spouse that does not value your input. Do you desire to know
God’s wisdom?
Solomon
observes that the patterns of our life are repeated in every aspect
of what we do and that includes all of our associations. Note Eight:
“Fools
show their annoyance at once, but the prudent overlook an insult“.
Hotheads are like school buses; they stop frequently and take a long
time to get anywhere. Associating with hotheads tends to give us
road rage. In contrast, Note Nine: “The
tongue of the wise brings healing… those who promote peace have
joy“. These Counselors
of Peace help us move forward
during the tough times. They bring us words of healing and
encouragement. Note Ten: “The
Lord detests lying lips“.
When you drive beside people that swerve, they cause you to swerve
too; these kind of friends cause accidents in our life. Note Eleven:
“Anxiety
weighs down the heart, but a kind word cheers it up… The righteous
choose their friends carefully… In the way of righteousness there
is life“. Are you
stuck in a rut? Do you desire a more abundant life? 2
Thessalonians 3:5 offers hope, “May
the Lord direct your hearts into the love of God and into the
steadfastness of Christ“.
Are you tired of being a beast of burden, whipped by the world?
Jesus promises His yoke is easy and His burden is light. Will you
allow Him to be Lord of your whole life?